


Clinging to Love

by Julesmonster



Series: The Rainbow Inn [7]
Category: House M.D., Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-18
Updated: 2012-09-18
Packaged: 2017-11-14 12:38:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/515318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Julesmonster/pseuds/Julesmonster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's something terribly wrong with Brian and only House can help him. Can he figure it out before it's too late? 7th story in the Rainbow Inn Universe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> A/N: Seventh story in the Rainbow Inn Universe

February 2007

Justin glanced at Brian for what seemed like the hundredth time in the last hour. He was really worried about his partner. Really worried. Over the past few months, Brian had been steadily losing weight and looking more and more gaunt each time Justin saw him. Brian had gone to his regular doctor and the man had run a few tests. He found nothing. Then Brian went back to his oncologist. Again there was nothing.

For a while, Brian let it go, believing that whatever was happening would correct itself in time. After all, if the doctors couldn't find it, it couldn't be real. But then the tremors began. Nothing major or noticeable to most observers, but Brian knew and Justin knew. Brian's hands would shake when he held a glass and his penmanship got just a bit worse.

When Brian came for Justin's show in New York, he had made an appointment with a specialist. Another two days of tests had turned up nothing. The only thing that changed was Brian was getting irritable and was so tired he could hardly keep his eyes open. When Justin felt his lover's forehead and found he had a fever, he swore. He had a rental car brought to the apartment and loaded a couple bags into it before waking Brian long enough to get him into the car.

The trip from Manhattan to Princeton New Jersey wasn't long, but it was nerve-wracking for Justin. He didn't drive very often anymore and the streets and highways in and around New York were treacherous under the best of circumstances. Luckily, the car had a GPS system built in, so Justin could concentrate of keeping the car on the road.

Brian slept the entire way.

Justin had been calling both House and Chase on and off the entire trip, but hadn't reached either of them yet. It wasn't until they were almost to Princeton that Justin's phone rang and he saw that the caller was Chase.

"Justin!" Chase said in his cheerful Australian accent. "How are you?"

"Not good," Justin said. "Chase, Brian's sick. Really sick. We've been to a bunch of doctors and they keep telling us that there nothing wrong. And now, I can't wake him up for more than a few minutes at a time and…"

"Justin, calm down," Chase said. "Where are you?"

"We're on our way to you," Justin said. "After all their shit, I don't trust anyone else to help him."

"How far away are you?" Chase asked.

Justin looked at the GPS. "The navigation system says about five miles from your hospital."

There was a shuffle and suddenly House was on the phone. "Is he breathing okay?"

"A little labored, but not much," Justin said. "His fever feels really high and he doesn't seem to really know what's going on."

"Alright," House said. "We're going to meet you at the hospital. Pull up to the emergency doors. I'll have someone there to meet you."

"Thank you," Justin practically sobbed.

"Justin, he's going to be okay," House said. "We're going to make sure of that. Okay?"

Justin took a deep breath. "Yeah. Okay."

"Alright," House said. "We'll meet you at the hospital."

The last minutes of his trip were a little easier than his first hour and a half. At least he knew that House was going to help them now.

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

Justin pulled up to the ER and saw a couple doctor and a few nurses waiting with a gurney. Justin put the rental car in park and climbed out.

"Mr. Taylor?" One of the doctors, a woman with long black hair and a warm smile greeted him. "I'm Lisa Cuddy. House called me to tell me you were coming. We're going to take care of Mr. Kinney."

"Thank you," Justin said with no small measure of relief. The next few minutes were a blur of movement and activity, but soon Brian was on the gurney, one of the orderlies was parking the car, and Justin was following behind Dr. Cuddy and answering her questions. Words were being tossed around that he didn't understand, words like tachycardic, but he understood the word crashing.

Suddenly, he was being pushed aside and Dr. Cuddy and the other doctor were both hovering over Brian. A defibrillator appeared as if from nowhere and someone was shouting "clear!" Justin watched in horror as Brian's entire body seemed to jump off the gurney and fall back just as quickly. "We've got a pulse."

Justin closed his eyes and refused to allow the tears to fall. He was stronger than this. He had to be stronger than this for Brian. And then he was following behind the gurney again and Brian was brought into a room with one glass wall and transferred to a bed. The nurses changed him into a hospital gown. Monitors were connected to Brian and an IV placed in his left hand. And then, just as suddenly as all the commotion began, it all seemed to end at once and Justin was left alone with Brian in this fishbowl of a room.

Justin held Brian's hand and watched his eyes blink open tiredly. "Hey."

"Hey," Justin said with a small smile.

"Where are we?" Brian asked.

"I brought you to House," Justin told him. "He's going to figure out what going on and fix it."

Brian nodded and was soon sleeping again.

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

House found Justin standing back away from Brian's bed while a nurse cleaned him up. He had obviously vomited. House mentally added that symptom to the list in his head.

"Hey," House said, getting Justin's attention. "Cuddy told me his heart stopped."

"Scariest moments of my life," Justin said with a shaky voice.

"Well, we've got him stable for now," House said. "Getting his fever down should help some as well." Justin nodded, but hardly took his eyes off of Brian. "We're going to need a complete history."

Justin nodded again and went to the chair where his messenger bag was setting. "I brought his file. He spent two days with some overpriced idiot in New York and the moron sent him home like this. The most recent tests are in there. I made sure."

"Brian uses recreational drugs," House said. "I have to ask, is there any chance that they are the cause?"

Justin shook his head. "He hasn't been feeling well for a while. He hasn't gone out and he doesn't do that shit unless he's out partying. He hasn't even smoked pot in more than a month."

"You're sure?" House asked.

"I may not be there everyday, but I know what the fuck is going on with him," Justin said crossly. "He hasn't taken anything. After the cancer, he stopped doing the hard shit. And he doesn't even do E very often anymore. He knows his body and he knows how it responds to various drugs. He hasn't taken anything bad. He hasn't taken anything period for more than a month."

"Alright," House said. "If you're sure."

"I'm sure."

"Then I need to get my team together and start going over everything in this file and try to figure out what's going on," House said. "Chase is doing rounds, but he said he'd be here as soon as he's done. He can't leave the idiot residents on their own or someone will end up dead prematurely."

Justin chuffed a half-hearted laugh. "I'll be here."

"Oh, and just so you know, visiting hours really don't apply to my patients," House said. "Anyone gives you a hard time and you tell them you're with me."

Justin nodded and went back to the chair beside Brian's bed and held his hand. House watched them together, remembering when Chase was in the bed and he was the one in the chair, praying to a god he didn't believe in for everything to be okay. He left without another word.

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

"Differential diagnosis people," House said to his team. He was not as fond of these three as he had been of Chase, Cameron, and Foreman. But Chase was now the Resident Director, Cameron was working in some clinic, and Foreman was working his way up the ladder in the neurology department. So here was, left with Larry, Moe and Curly. Also known as Freedman, Gold and Stevens. "Thirty-six year old male, presenting with tachycardia, a BP of 148/68, nausea, high fever, labored breathing, delirium and extreme fatigue. His life partner reports that he has recently been to numerous doctors due to unexplained weight loss and tremors. Go."

"Is he at high risk?" Gold asked.

House glared at the younger doctor. "What exactly does that mean?"

"I think what he means is does this patient use recreational drugs or engage in unsafe sex, isn't that right?" Stevens, in her Mary Poppins way was trying to keep the peace, but she was just pissing House off.

"Yeah, right," Gold said with a careless shrug.

"He has a history of drug use, but he has been clean for the past several months," House said. "His tox screens have proved that to be true."

"Yeah, but if he was sleeping around and sharing needles, it makes a difference," Freedman said, jumping on Gold's bandwagon.

"He is not an IV drug user," House said through gritted teeth. "And he does not participate in unprotected sex."

"But he does sleep around?" Gold asked. "'Cause this sounds a lot like Hep B to me."

"Or a drug overdose," Freedman agreed.

"It is neither of those things," House growled. "I've got a complete fucking medical history in my hands and it isn't Hep B or a drug overdose. Come on people! Use your puny excuses for brains and give me something we can work with!"

"Well, maybe we should run the tests," Stevens said mildly. "Just to be sure."

"Get out," House said quietly. The three stooges stopped. "Are you hard of hearing? Get the fuck out and don't come back! You are completely useless! Go!"

They scrambled, still looking like they were in complete shock. As they left the diagnostics room, House saw them pass Wilson, who was standing in the doorway. He'd obviously just heard.

"That probably wasn't the smartest thing you've ever done," Wilson said.

"They're idiots," House said with more bravado than he felt. "Wilson…"

"Cuddy asked me to consult based on his cancer history," Wilson shrugged. "So I'm at your disposal."

"Thanks," House said.

Chase came into the room looking somewhat confused. "I just saw the three stooges. They said you fired them?"

"Yeah," House said. "Robbie…"

Chase nodded before House could even finish his thought. "I'll get Dickson to cover for me for a few days. This is Brian and Justin after all."

"Okay," House said and turned back to his white board while Wilson and Chase settled into seats. "Differential diagnosis."

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

"His eyes are yellow," Justin said to Chase before even greeting his friend. "His eyes aren't supposed to be yellow. And he's getting itchy. He keeps scratching in his sleep."

"Okay," Chase said and noted that on the chart in front of him. "How are you holding up?"

"I've been better," Justin said quietly. "Is he going to be okay? What's wrong with him?"

"We've got a few ides," Chasse said. "All three are treatable if we catch it in time. The first possibility is Thalassemia, a severe genetic form of anemia. The second is something called a thyroid storm. It's basically caused by the thyroid going hyperactive. The last is toxic shock syndrome. TSS is caused by an infection that gets out of control. I'm going to draw blood and run the tests for these particular problems and see where we get."

"Okay," Justin said. "What about cancer? Could that be the problem?"

"We don't think so," Chase said and put a hand on Justin's shoulder to try and reassure him. "Wilson—he's House's best friend and the head of oncology—he's taking a look at the scans the other doctors ran, but we don't think it's likely based on his fever and tachycardia."

"What's that?" Justin asked.

"Tachycardia?" Chase asked. "That's an irregularly fast heart rate. That's what caused his heart to stop before. Brian's heart was beating too fast and it just couldn't keep it up. Like your legs giving out when you've run too far."

"So it wasn't like a real heart attack?" Justin asked. "I mean from damage to the heart?"

"It could cause serious damage if we can't get his heart rate under control, but the meds we have him on is helping," Chase said. "And the yellow eyes? That's because his liver is starting to shut down. We'll keep an eye on that too, but the best way to fix that is to fix the reason behind the failure."

Justin nodded. "Okay. Thanks Chase."

"Hey Justin, do you want me to call anyone?" Chase asked. "His mom?"

Justin huffed. "Hell no. Brian doesn't want to see her when he's well, let alone when he's sick. I'll have to call Michael and Debbie eventually. I want to hold off, though. Otherwise we'll end up with half of gay Pittsburgh out here."

"Would that be such a bad thing?" Chase asked. "You could probably use a little support."

Justin shrugged. "I've got you and House for now. Let's wait and see what the tests say. If things are bad, or you think he'll be in the hospital for a long time, I'll call. Otherwise…"

"Okay," Chase said. He collected the vials of blood he would need and then turned to go. Before he left, however, Wilson came in. "Oh, Justin. This is Dr. James Wilson. He's the friend I told you about."

"The head of Oncology," Justin said and held out his hand to shake Wilson's. "Nice to meet you. I have actually heard some stories about you, but not anything to do with oncology."

Wilson shook his head ruefully. "I can just imagine some of the things House might tell you."

"He's definitely a character," Justin said. "But he's the only person I'd trust with Brian's life right now."

"Then you are a very smart man," Wilson said. "House can be the biggest ass I know, but he's also the best doctor I know."

"Did you… did you get a chance to look at Brian's scans?" Justin asked.

Wilson nodded. He understood that the fear of cancer, especially for those who have survived it once, can be great. "His scans were clear. I could run the tests again, but there really doesn't seem to be any connection between his cancer three years ago and whatever is making him sick now."

Justin nodded as one fear was removed. House trusted this guy, so Justin felt like he could too. "Okay." Wilson started to turn, but Justin stopped him. "I was wondering, I thought House had a team of doctors. I mean, you and Chase seem to be doing all the work on Brian's case."

Wilson chuckled. "House had a moment earlier." When Justin still looked confused he added, "He fired them all because they were being idiots, in his opinion anyway."

"Oh." Justin said. "Yeah, I suppose I can see him doing something like that."

"Don't worry," Wilson said. "Chase and I have both signed on for the duration. Brian is in very capable hands. Listen, I'm heading down to the cafeteria in a little while. Would you like me to bring you anything back?"

"I'm not very hungry," Justin shrugged. "But I suppose I should eat. Maybe just a sandwich?"

"Okay," Wilson agreed and soon left.

Justin took his seat beside Brian again and reviewed all of the new information he'd gotten from Chase and Wilson. Brian's condition, while serious, was probably treatable. Meaning, it wasn't life threatening. Unless his heart stopped beating again. But they had that under control for now. He didn't have cancer. He was going to survive. Even if things seemed really scary right now, Brian was going to be okay.


	2. Part Two

_**Part Two** _

Justin woke from a fitful nap. He didn't remember clasping Brian's hand, but he suddenly felt Brian's hand squeezing his. He stood so that he could see Brian's face clearly. His hazel eyes were blinking sleepily, but he seemed more coherent. "Hey."

"Hey," Brian said. "What happened?"

"You got a really high fever and couldn't stay awake," Justin told him. "So I brought you to House and Chase. They're taking care of you."

"I feel like crap," Brian said. "And so tired."

"I know," Justin said. "It's okay to sleep. I'll make sure you know what's going on. Chase is running some tests so they can figure out what's causing all these problems. And Wilson, House's friend, is the head of oncology and he took a look at your scans. He says it's definitely not cancer, so that's good, right?"

"That's great," Brian agreed. "Did you call anyone?"

"Not yet," Justin said. "I figured it could wait until we know more. Is that alright?"

"Probably best," Brian said. "Call Cynthia. Tell her. Tell her that she can tell Teddy, but if he squeals, I'll…. Shit. Can't think of what I'd do."

Justin chuckled. "That's okay, I'm sure she and Ted both can imagine."

"Right," Brian said with a weak grin. "Sucks being in a bed and not being strong enough to fuck. That was the worst part of radiation. Too sick to screw."

"I remember," Justin said with the first real smile he'd given since leaving New York.

"Look who's up," House said from the doorway. "Thought you were going to waste the entire day away."

"Still might," Brian said. "I'm tired."

"I know," House told him. "I'm pretty sure I know what's wrong."

"What?" Justin demanded.

House looked at both of them and said, "Thyroid storm. I believe that the reason you've been losing weight is that your thyroid has been over producing thyroxine, a hormone that affects your metabolism. If that condition goes untreated, it can cause a thyroid storm. Now, we can wait until the tests come back in a few hours to treat you, but the longer we wait, the longer the thyroxine has to overflow your system."

"What makes you think it's this thyroid storm?" Brian asked.

"You've been feeling crummy lately," House said. "Tired, anxious, trembling and losing weight for no reason. I also notice that you've lost some of the fine hairs on your upper cheeks and the insides of your arms. All of those things point to hyperthyroidism. Add to that, your most recent and most severe symptoms did not show up until after that last doctor used iodine contrasting for you last CT scan. Iodine can trigger a thyroid storm."

"What if we go ahead but it turns out this isn't what's wrong?" Justin asked.

"Well, the chances of that are low," House said. "But if it did turn out that way, the lowering of Brian's thyroxine levels would only be temporary and the negative effects mild."

Brian and Justin shared a look before Justin said, "Go ahead and treat him."

"Alright," House said cheerfully. "You guys are much easier to deal with than most of my patients."

"How would you know?" Chase asked from the doorway. "You never actually visit your patients."

"Huh. Well that is true." House walked to the door. "Start him on corticosteroids and propylthiouracil. Then get Wilson to do an ultrasound on his thyroid. I'm guessing here, but I think Brian's got nodules causing all of this."

Once House was gone, Chase went to get the meds and sent a page to Wilson about the ultrasound.

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

Brian slept again and House and Chase convinced Justin to eat the sandwich that Wilson had brought up for him in the diagnostics room down the hall. The nurse would come and get them if Brian woke up.

"Have you talked to Jerry recently?" Chase asked.

Justin shook his head. "I haven't but I know Brian has. Brian talks to him a lot, actually."

"How's he doing?" House wondered.

"Brian said he's getting by," Justin said with a shrug. "He's had to hire in someone to help with the work."

"Who's Jerry?" Wilson asked the other men.

"He owns the B&B we go to all the time," Chase said. "That's where we met Brian and Justin."

"Jerry and his partner Ryan used to run the Inn together, but Ryan died in October," Justin said in a subdued voice. "It was right after we all left. I had to go back because I left my cell phone. Jerry was… so calm about the whole thing. I can't imagine I would be if I were in his place. Anyway, I called Brian and he came back to help take care of everything."

"We all went back for the funeral, but Brian and Justin stayed that whole week with Jerry," Chase said.

Justin shrugged. "He needed someone to be there. Neither of them had any family and most of their friends are gone or retired to Florida. Anyway, Ryan once told me that Brian called them pretty regularly and since Ryan died, he's kept in close contact with Jerry. Doesn't tell me what they talk about, but he does tell me that Jerry's holding up okay."

"He's a tough old guy," House said. "I've driven out there a couple times."

"And he seemed to be okay when we were all there last month," Chase said. "I just can't imagine losing a partner who you've been with for more than forty years."

"I can't imagine being with anyone for forty years," Wilson admitted.

"I can," Justin said. He set aside the rest of his sandwich and stood up. "I'm gonna head back to Brian's room."

"Okay," House said. "Wilson will be there soon to do the ultrasound."

Justin nodded and headed back down the hall. Once he was gone the others ate in silence for a time.

"Poor kid," Wilson said. "It must be so hard to go through something like this so young."

"That kid has been through more horrible things than this," House said. "He's tougher than he looks."

"I don't understand?" Wilson said.

"I'll list them, shall I?" House said. "Let's start with being tossed out by his father, who also decided to ram Brian's car and then assault him in an alley. Then there was the kid from his school who took a bat to his head."

"Don't forget Brian's cancer," Chase said.

"Of course not," House replied. "Then some homophobic psycho blew up the club he and a few hundred others were having a fund raiser in. Some people died, a lot were injured, including some people Justin and Brian knew and were close to."

"And that's just the bad stuff," Chase said. "At 23 years old, Justin has already been the co-creator of a popular gay comic book, almost had that same comic made into a movie and is now one of the hottest new artists in the country."

"Wow," Wilson said. "That's impressive."

"He's a great kid," House said.

"And he'd have both your asses if he heard you call him a kid," Chase told them as he got up and cleared away their garbage. "Come on, I want to see how Brian is responding to the treatment."

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

"So why exactly are you taking an ultrasound of my throat?" Brian asked from his position flat on his back. He'd been dozing rather pleasantly when Justin and this twat had decided to wake him up.

"You are responding well to the treatments we started," Wilson said as he fiddled with some buttons on the portable ultrasound machine. "And the tests finally came back to confirm that you were experiencing a thyroid storm, which means you have had an overactive thyroid for some time. Now we have to find out exactly why your thyroid is acting up. One of the potential causes of hyperthyroidism is nodules on the thyroid."

"I still can't believe you people call it a storm," Brian muttered. "They couldn't come up with a better name?"

House smirked from his position leaning against the wall. "The real name is thyrotoxic crisis. Thyroid storm just sounds cooler."

"This nodule thing would be in his neck," Justin said. "Wouldn't we have noticed a lump there?"

"Usually," Wilson said. "But not always. That's why we're doing the ultrasound."

Wilson squirted some lubricating gel onto Brian's neck and he protested loudly. "Fuck that's cold. A considerate person would warm that shit up first."

"You never do," Justin teased.

"I never claimed to be considerate," Brian smirked.

"I'll need you to keep still and quiet for a few minutes," Wilson said. He brought the Doppler wand over to Brian's neck and began looking for any abnormalities. It only took a few moments. "There it is."

"There's a nodule?" Justin asked as he looked at the screen.

Wilson pointed to the small growth near the rear of Brian's thyroid. "That is a toxic adenoma."

"Toxic?" Brian asked, though he tried to keep still.

House nodded and explained, "Yes, but not toxic in the way you are thinking. It's classified toxic because the nodule produces thyroid hormones independent of the normal regulating controls. Your pituitary gland releases TSH, which tell the thyroid how much hormone your body needs. This nodule ignores that message and does what it wants."

"Just like you," Justin said teasingly. "Always ignoring the rules and doing what you want."

"So doc," Brian said. "What exactly does this tell us? What's next?"

"We do a fine-needle aspiration biopsy," Wilson said. Before either of them could get too worked up over that he continued. "It is very rare—as in less than 5% of all thyroid nodules, and even fewer in toxic adenomas—that turn out to be cancerous, but we need to make sure."

"If it is cancerous, we remove it, and most of your thyroid," House said. "More likely, we'll give you radioactive iodine to block your thyroid's ability to produce hormones."

"Wait," Justin said. "He needs his thyroid, doesn't he?"

"Yes," Wilson said. "And he would probably need to take replacement hormones for the rest of his life in order to maintain a proper level."

"So we're going from too much to too little?" Brian asked, sitting up a little, though his bed was still flat. "Can't this be treated with drugs?"

"You're giving him drugs now, aren't you?" Justin asked.

House nodded. "We could, but we won't. The drugs you're on right now are not a permanent solution. They can cause serious liver damage and affect your body's ability to fight infection. Risk wise, it's much better to radiate the gland and take the very safe hormone replacement therapy."

Brian laid back down and sighed. "Okay then. Daily hormone pills it is."

"Alright," Wilson said. "Let's do this biopsy while we've got the ultrasound."

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

"Brian?" Justin's voice sounded loud in his own ears in the quiet hospital room. It was late and the lights had all been dimmed for the evening, but Justin could tell Brian was still awake.

"Yeah?"

"You scared me," Justin said.

Brian turned so that he could look at Justin in the dimmed light. "I know. I'm sorry."

Justin shook his head and sat up in the cot that the nurse had brought in. "No. I know it wasn't your fault. You went to the doctors, they were just idiots."

"Well, House did say that it's pretty rare for a man my age to have thyroid issues," Brian said. "Mostly women or older people get this stuff."

"I know," Justin said. He was quiet for a time.

"What's really bothering you, Sunshine?" Brian asked. He grabbed Justin's hand and tugged him until the blond climbed onto the narrow bed with him. Once they were spooned together with Brian's arms wrapped around Justin, he nudged his partner again. "So? Spill."

Justin shrugged. "It's just… All of this has made me think. I hate being away from you."

"You couldn't have done anything to prevent this," Brian told him.

"That's not what I mean," Justin sighed. "I mean, Jerry just lost Ryan, and I could have lost you. I don't want to look back on my life and regret the time I could have been with you, but wasn't."

"And I don't want you to regret the time you could have been young and free and weren't," Brian said.

Justin huffed a sad laugh. "I know."

"Go to sleep Sunshine," Brian whispered and kissed Justin's cheek. "This will all look better in the morning."


	3. Part Three

_**Part Three** _

Justin woke up still in Brian's arms. Though he couldn't see his face, Justin could tell that Brian was still sleeping. That was good. He needed the rest. Justin carefully climbed from the bed without waking Brian and grabbed his overnight bag, then went into the bathroom to change clothes and clean up. Once he was clean, Justin set out to find food. He found Chase dozing in House's office on his Eames lounge chair. Brian would love that chair and ottoman, Justin thought ruefully. He was reluctant to wake his friend, but he really was hungry.

"Mmm," Chase groaned as he yawned and stretched. "Good morning. What time is it?"

"A little after seven" Justin said. "I was wondering where I could go to get something to eat, and also if it would be okay to bring Brian something. I know he's going to be pissy about hospital food."

Chase smoothed down his wayward hair and straightened his clothes before putting on his white lab coat. "As long as he's not nauseous, I don't see any reason why he can't eat what he wants. Hang on while I go tell the nurses where I'll be and I'll go down to the cafeteria with you."

A few minutes later, they were heading down to the cafeteria and Justin asked why Chase had spent the night. Chase smiled, "I was elected to watch over Brian. Technically, the ICU doctor on-call could handle anything that comes up, but House never likes to leave his patients with anyone he hasn't hand picked. Considering this is Brian we're talking about, I was happy to agree. Between you and me, though, I think he wanted Wilson to offer to stay."

"Doesn't like sleeping without you?" Justin asked with a smile. They had reached the cafeteria and it was rather quiet that early.

"He hates it," Chase said. "He's always twice as grumpy after a night when I'm on duty."

"He never stays?" Justin asked after he ordered eggs, bacon, fried potatoes and toast for himself. He'd come back to get Brian's egg white omelet before they left.

Chase ordered for himself, and then said, "House tries never to actually see any patients. He has to occasionally, but he tries to avoid it as much as possible. The amount of time he's spent with you and Brian has gotten all the nurses gossiping, wondering what the connection is."

Justin laughed. They were both occupied for a few minutes getting coffee, juice, and their plates and then paying, so it wasn't until they had found a booth to sit in that Justin asked a question that had been bothering him for a while. "Do you _really_ only ever call him House?"

Chase chuckled. "No, I call him Greg, but only when we're alone. He calls me Robbie when we're alone. And sometimes around other people, but only in a mocking way then."

"It just seems so odd," Justin said. "I mean, I know Tony and Jethro go by their last names at work, but they use first names the rest of the times. And Seeley goes by Booth at work, but Zack calls him Seeley all the time. In my world, the only time you use a person's last name is with an honorific in front of it, and then only because you really don't know them very well."

Chase nodded. "In a hospital, everyone is Dr. Something. It makes it easier to drop the honorific. But then, you get so used to calling a person by their last name, it gets hard to change. I lived with a colleague before House and I got together. I almost never called her Allison, even in bed. And I don't think she ever called me Robbie."

"Allison," Justin mused. "Isn't that the name of the woman Wilson was talking about last night?"

Chase chuckled. "Yeah. She and I were living together, but she and Wilson were carrying on an affair for way longer. I found out about it and let it go on for a while, then I gave into House's advances and so we were both cheating. And neither House nor Wilson told the other. So when I ended up with a brain tumor, House pretty much let all the cats out of the bag at once. It was pretty funny. Cameron and Wilson were both indignant until House and I pointed out how hypocritical that was. Anyway, they're still together, though House considers it a minor miracle."

"Why's that?" Justin asked.

"Because Wilson's a philanderer," Chase said. "Divorced three times, numerous serious relationships, habitual cheater… And she's emotionally crippled because she lost her husband very young. The fact that they kept the affair up as long as they did was an accomplishment. That they've lasted another two years since then…yeah, I'd call it a minor miracle."

"And he hasn't cheated?" Justin asked.

Chase shrugged. "I don't think so. He usually feels guilty after a while and tells on himself, so I suppose not."

"I don't get that," Justin said.

"This coming from a man in an open relationship," Chase said.

Justin shrugged. "But we have rules and we stick by those rules. We trust each other because we're honest with each other. It's not the sleeping around I have a problem with, it's the lying."

"How exactly does that work?" Chase questioned. "I've always wondered."

Justin grinned. "A lot of people do. It's pretty simple. We never kiss a trick. Tricks are welcome in our beds, but not in our relationship or our hearts. And we tell each other everything. If I pick up a trick, I tell him all about it. He sometimes goes out to Babylon and will hook up with three different guys in one night, but he tells me all about them."

"And you are okay listening to that?" Chase asked.

"It's fucking hot listening to him describe some of the stuff he does," Justin said with a leer. "Phone sex is highly underrated. Besides, we don't just trick when we're apart. We trick when we're together too. I've watched him fuck so many men I couldn't even begin to guess at the number. And he's watched me fuck and suck. We've had threesomes, foursomes, and orgies. It wasn't always easy for me to separate the sex from the love, but I don't think I could have a normal relationship now. I don't even want to try."

"Is that why you two didn't get married?" Chase asked. He had sometimes toyed with the idea of him and House getting married some day, but had never broached the subject with his lover.

"Sort of," Justin said. "It was a lot of things really. Brian asked right after Babylon was bombed. He was really shaken up by that and started acting out of character. When I realized his motivation for the proposal, I called him on it. At the same time, I got some really good reviews for my art in a New York paper. Brian wanted me to follow my dreams and I wanted the man I fell in love with back. So we called off the wedding and here we are today."

Justin stood up and said, "Weddings are all very pretty, but they aren't what really matters. What really counts are all the little things that happen everyday. Those things that show you that he loves you and that he's planning to be around for the long haul." He smiled at Chase. "And I can tell House may not be the best at baring his soul, but he's certainly does love you. Don't worry so much about a piece of paper. If you really want to celebrate, throw a party."

Justin walked off to order Brian's breakfast to go and Chase stayed where he was to think about everything Justin had said.

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

Dr. Lisa Cuddy walked into House's office and stared at the thorn in her side. He was listening to his ipod and playing his PSP with his back to her. She shook her head and looked up at the portrait of House and Chase that had appeared a few months ago. She never got tired of that painting. Not only was it artistically amazing, the painter had captured House's personality perfectly. House kicking puppies while groping his lover. She pretended not to notice the groping part, otherwise she'd have to tell him to take it down and she really liked that painting.

"House!" Cuddy shouted to be heard over whatever music the doctor had blasting into his head.

House pulled one earphone from his ear and swiveled his chair around to see who was disturbing his fun time. "Dr. Cuddy and the always delectable twins! To what do I owe the honor of your company?"

Cuddy refused to look down and make sure her blouse hadn't popped open. Instead she glared at House and said, "I would like an explanation."

"For what? For our existence? Well, first mommy seduced daddy with her wicked wantonness and then daddy put his—"

"I want to know why you fired your entire staff!" Cuddy huffed, cutting him off before he could get too graphic. "And why you have commandeered my head of oncology and resident director to do your grunt work!"

"They were idiots," House told her carelessly. "I should have fired them a long time ago. And you're the one who sent Wilson my way. He told me so himself. As for Chase… well, he's friends with the patient. Who am I to say he shouldn't help?"

"Why are they idiots this time" Cuddy asked with her arms folded over her chest.

"I told them it wasn't Hep B or a drug overdose but they couldn't get past Brian's lifestyle enough to see the medicine," House said. "First of all, they made some pretty gross assumptions based solely on the fact that he's gay. Just because their assumptions happen to be true this time, doesn't make it any less bad medicine. Especially since Brian gets a complete STD screening every three months, including testing for Hep B and since his tox screen came back completely negative. If had left it up to them Brian would be dead by now."

Cuddy shook her head in exasperation. "Fine. As soon as this patient is discharged, I want my staff back. And I want you to hire a new team. No excuses."

"Give me Chase back and I'll have two new doctors in here by the end of next week," House bargained.

"I can't let you have Chase," Cuddy said.

"Why not?" House asked. "We'll sign papers waving the hospitals liability for sexual harassment or whatever HR requires."

Cuddy paused. That _would_ solve the problem with House supervising his lover, and Chase had always done more of House's paperwork than he should have—these days she was lucky to get a billing report six months after a patient was discharged. "Does Chase even want to come back?"

House shrugged. "I don't know. But I'd like the opportunity to ask him. He could be the Assistant Head of Diagnostics. A promotion."

"Not a promotion when he's already the resident director," Cuddy argued, but then relented. "But it would be a lateral move with a slightly higher pay scale. Alright, talk to him, but if I find out you pressured him into a decision, I'll… I'll triple your clinic hours for the next six months."

House narrowed his eyes at her. "You wouldn't dare."

"Try me," Cuddy said. "This has to be Chase's decision. I know for a fact that he _likes_ working with the residents."

House shrugged. "Not as much as he loves me."

"Loving a person and wanting to work for them are two very different things," Cuddy warned. She looked back at the painting. "The young man I met yesterday. Mr. Taylor. Is he the artist?"

"Justin. Yeah," House confirmed as he stood up to admire the portrait again. "He's really good, isn't he? Making a name for himself in the art world. I looked up auction results for his paintings for the last six months online and they start at $3,000 and can go upwards of $12,000 at auction."

"And he just gave that to you?" Cuddy asked. "He must like _Chase_ a lot."

House just stuck his tongue out at her and then watched her leave.

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

"So I just take this pill and all my problems will go away?" Brian asked

"It'll take about three months for the radioactive iodine to do its job fully," Chase told him. "But yeah. Just take that pill and your problems will go away."

"We'll keep you here for a couple days to make sure that you don't have any bad reactions to the iodine," Wilson said. "And then you'll need to watch for any side effects for a few weeks. And finally, follow up with an endocrinologist to get started on the hormone replacement therapy."

"Sounds pretty simple," Brian said. He still hesitated.

"What is it?" Justin asked.

"Is this shit gonna make me sick?" Brian asked. "'Cause the last time I had anything to do with radiation, it really sucked hairy balls."

"It shouldn't," Chase said with a chuckle, unable to hide his amusement. "This is a really low dose of radiation and the iodine makes it so that only the thyroid is affected."

Brian nodded and then took the pill. "There. Let the miracle begin."


	4. Part Four

_**Part Four** _

Brian saw the arrangement of flowers, condoms and dildos coming through his doorway the next day and groaned. "Justin!"

Justin peeked from behind the vase and smiled. "Did I forget to mention that I called this morning Michael and told him what happened?"

Brian watched Justin set the vase on the window ledge and sighed. "How soon before he and Debbie get here?"

"Actually, they aren't coming," Justin said as he took a seat on Brian's bed. "I convinced them that you are fine and that you would be very pissed if they dropped everything to come here for nothing. That's why they sent the flowers. I never knew that florists made this sort of arrangement."

"I suppose you have to know the right florist," Brian said with a smirk. It was rather tasteless and fun. He sobered after a minute, though. "They really aren't coming to see me?"

Justin rolled his eyes. "I can call them back. I'm sure they would drive all night to make it here before you're discharged to morrow just so they can see you in a tacky backless hospital gown."

Just then a candy striper carried in another arrangement of flowers and a big Mylar balloon spelling out Get Well. Brian turned to Justin with raised eyebrows.

"Did I forget to mention I called the girls too?" Justin said sheepishly.

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

"Chay-ase," House sang in a simpering voice that made Chase's every instinct towards self-preservation spring to life. They were lying in bed together, taking advantage of the fact that Wilson had to be at the hospital that night for one of his own patients and could keep watch over Brian. They had made love earlier and were now almost asleep. "Rob-bie."

"What, Greg?" Chase asked warily.

"Um…"

"House?"

"Never mind," House mumbled.

"House, just spit it out please so we can get some sleep," Chase sighed. "Unlike you, I slept in a chair in your office last night."

House huffed but finally said, "You wanna come back and work for me?"

Chase was still and silent for what seemed like an eternity to House, but not enough time to Chase, since he couldn't seem to form a rational response to that question. "Um…"

"I guess not," House said and rolled over so that his back was to Chase and prepared to sleep.

"Greg," Chase sighed as he sat up and leaned against the headboard. "You can't just spring something like that on me. I thought Cuddy wouldn't let me work in your department?"

House rolled back over and stared at Chase for a moment before he hauled himself up and leaned against the headboard as well. "I told her that we'd sign some waiver for HR if she wanted."

"So I can work for you," Chase said to clarify.

"You'd be the assistant department head," House said. "It's a lateral move as far as seniority, but it would mean a small pay raise."

Chase was quiet again and House let him think the proposal through. "We only worked together for a couple months after we really got together. Can we work together and keep the two relationships separate? I mean, we can't let work affect home and we can't let home affect work. Is that even possible?"

"I have no idea," House told him. "But I really would like to find out. I miss working with you."

Chase paused. "I miss it too. Working on Brian's case, even though it was relatively mundane, brought back the thrill I always got when we were able to explain what no one else could. Solving the puzzles that no one else could solve. But… If I give up my position as Resident Director, I can't expect Cuddy to hold it for me on the chance that this doesn't work out. Dickson is already chomping at the bit to take my place."

"It would be a major risk," House admitted. To him that wasn't a bad thing, but he knew that Chase wasn't as excited by risking everything as he was.

"And one I think is worth taking," Chase finally said, a small smile growing as he looked at House's surprised face. "Hey. I happen to think you and I are worth risking everything for."

House grinned. "Me too." He rolled to his side and pressed their lips together. Their lips met and it was like a bolt of electricity shot through each of them. Neither man was sleepy any longer. Without warning, that simple little kiss escalated into a full blown snog. Tongues met and dueled, teeth collided, and lips were bruised with the need to get ever closer. House found himself pulling Chase closer, needing to feel more of the lithe young man against him. Without breaking the kiss, he dragged Chase to straddle his lap and held him tightly. Chase didn't try to resist. Instead, he clutched at the bedding and ground his hips into House's throbbing erection.

Still relaxed and open from their earlier round of love-making, Chase grabbed the lube and slicked up House. His cock was ramrod stiff, like a monument to manhood, and without further delay, Chase raised himself up and let House guide his cock to Chase's hole as he slowly lowered himself. With a groan of pleasure for both men, the head slipped inside and Chase paused there to catch his breath. House strained to make his lover move, but his weak leg gave Chase more control in that position, so the young man was free to take his time and set a slow and excruciating pace, one designed to tease and torment them both.

Slowly, Chase shifted around to find the perfect angle. Leaning back slightly, he found that he could stimulate his prostate on every stroke. Chase grabbed the headboard for balance, leaned slightly back and began a steadily increasing rhythm, up down, up down. House began to pump his hips into Chase as much as he could, totally ignoring the pain it caused his leg. Chase held on with one hand and used his other to reach back and finger House's hole, finding the older man's prostate. The added stimulation seemed to drive House wild under him and Chase thought for a brief moment that he now knew what it would be like to ride a bucking bronco.

Despite their earlier activities, in mere minutes, House was coming into his young lover. And Chase was coming too; with House's strong grip on his young cock, he was coming like a fountain over House's chest and belly.

They both came down from their orgasmic highs slowly. Chase slid to the side of House and grabbed the box of tissues from the bedside table. After a few brief moments of cleaning up House curled his arms around Chase and pulled the blankets over them. Together, they drifted off to sleep.

**XOXOXOXOXOX**

"You two look well rested," Justin said with a smile the next morning as House and Chase entered Brian's hospital room. Wilson was there already, removing the IV from Brian's arm.

"I'd say that they look well fucked," Brian corrected his lover. He narrowed his eyes at Chase and House and said slowly, "Twice last night. And again this morning. Hmmm… and House played bottom boy for this morning's session."

Chase laughed and House scowled. Wilson's reaction, however, was the most amusing. "Could we not… talk about that please?"

"A little latent homophobia?" Brian asked with a thin veneer of amusement.

"Nothing like that," Wilson frowned. "To be perfectly frank, I never wanted to know about House's sex life when he was with women either. It's just… Ew."

"Well fuck you too," House said. "I'll remember that the next time you want to share a story about Cameron making you her bitch. I know you like the lacy thongs and the strap on, but I'm pretty sure you could do without the bustier."

"That! …That's not… Christ, House!" Wilson stammered out. He had finished with Brian and was shaking in outrage. "I can't believe you!"

"Why not?" House asked as he leaned casually against Chase, an arm wrapped around the younger man's shoulder. "You've known me for a lot of years now. You should not be surprised by the things that come out of my mouth."

"That is true," Chase agreed.

"Even I know to expect the most outrageous shit from House," Justin said. "And I know that most of it is bullshit."

"Though you probably wouldn't be quite so upset if it wasn't true," Brian pointed out.

Wilson was still glaring at House, but a blush was now covering his face. He muttered, "Fuck all of you."

"So, am I free to go?" Brian asked.

"That depends," Chase said. "On how you are feeling."

"A lot better than I have been for the last few months," Brian admitted. "For the first time in a while I'm not shaking."

"In that case, get out," House said.

"I asked around and got a couple referrals for endocrinologists in Pittsburgh," Chase said. "I promise that these doctors will have a clue about how to treat you. And next time your doctors can't figure out what the heck is going on, come to us before you have a heart attack, please."

"I'll make sure of it," Justin promised.

"I can take care of myself Sunshine," Brian groused. "Besides, how exactly do you plan on babysitting me from New York."

"Easy," Justin said with a shrug as he dug through Brian's overnight bag. "I'm not going to be in New York. I'm moving back to Pittsburgh."

"Oh no you aren't!" Brian practically shouted even as he grabbed the clothes Justin was holding out for him.

"I think that's our cue to leave," Chase said, practically dragging House away. "We'll see you both in April?"

"We'll be there," Justin promised. Brian ignored them all and headed for the bathroom to wash up and change out of the hospital gown and into his own clothes.

Once the two doctors were gone and Brian had reemerged, the brunet stared at his younger lover. "You aren't moving," Brian said. "Your career is in New York."

"But my life is in Pittsburgh," Justin said. Before Brian could argue with him, Justin continued, "And I'm not just talking about you. My friends and family are all there. It's my home. And yes, I want to be there with you too, but if you're going to be an ass about the whole thing, I'll come back and move in with my mother until I can find something else."

Brian snorted in disbelief. "Yeah right. What about your art? What about the shows?"

"I've been trying to tell you for months that I don't have to be there all the time," Justin huffed. "My agent handles most of the legwork, and now that I've developed a reputation, it isn't as vital for me to be there in person all the time. I can go back for openings and interviews and such, but I don't have to live there."

"And your agent agrees with this?" Brian asked, really listening for the first time. He'd been so worried about making sure Justin did what he needed to do, in spite of his personal feelings, that he hadn't allowed himself to believe that Justin might be right. "He says that you can work in Pittsburgh?"

Justin finished packing Brian's bag and rolled his eyes. "He said that months ago. He's been saying that since that show at the Montmartre Gallery last August. And I've been telling you, but you didn't want to hear it. Well, guess what? I'm done trying to get it through your head. I'm moving home with or without your blessing."

Brian stared at his lover for a long time before speaking. "You are not moving in with your mother. She does not need to know how often we go out."

Justin held back the smile that wanted to break free and said with as much seriousness as he could muster, "I could move in with Debbie and Carl. They're used to me coming and going at all hours of the night."

Brian grabbed Justin and pulled him into his arms. "You aren't staying with Debbie and Carl either." And then Brian was kissing him hard and hungry.

When they finally broke for air, Justin's voice was breathless and shaky as he asked, "So where am I going to stay?"

Brian tightened his hold on Justin. "Well, if you insist on returning to the Pitts, I suppose I'll just have to have you stay with me. I bought that big old house for you, you know. Besides, it would be stupid to stay anywhere else, since that's where your studio is."

"Of course," Justin said with all seriousness, not showing a glimmer of the joy that wanted to erupt from inside. "We wouldn't want to do something that wasn't practical. And it is a very nice studio you had built for me."

Brian kissed Justin again and then pulled away, but didn't let go of the blond completely. "Are you absolutely sure that this is what you want? Because your mom and Lindsey both are going to be up my ass over you coming home. I want to be perfectly clear that this was all your idea and exactly what you want."

Justin finally let his smile break free, the one that gave him his moniker of Sunshine. "I'm absolutely posi-fucking-tively certain that being with you, that being home, is what I want and what I need." He very carefully avoided mentioning that it was what Brian wanted and needed as well. "I paint better at home. I'm happier there. And I won't have to live in a shitty little rat trap apartment that costs more than the mortgage on the loft every month."

"I'll miss the excuse to go shopping at Barney's every month," Brian sighed.

Justin picked up their duffle bags and hefted the straps over his shoulder. The two men started down the hall to the elevator. "You know I'll still need to go back pretty regularly—at least once a month. You could probably go with me, if you weren't too busy working."

Brian pressed the elevator button and looked down at his little twink. "Uh huh. We'll go to New York, but you aren't using that as an excuse to drag me to every fucking art museum in the city. If I go, I go to shop."

"Uh huh," Justin said with a knowing smile as they stepped into the elevator. They would shop and then Brian would be the one who suggested going to one of the museums. He usually did.

As the elevator doors began to close, Brian leaned down and kissed Justin one more time. "I love you, you little shit."

"And I love you, asshole."

**The End for Now**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay, so that's the end of Clinging to Love...I know, it was very short. It was all that the story seemed to have for us though. Summer at the Inn is next, followed by Rage. Then there's only Winter at the Inn to finish the series. I'll post all three tomorrow! Jules


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